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Introduction

Alright, let's jump in here. Minecraft, the game fanboyed about by billions of ten-year-olds around the globe, the game that has the worst graphics but the best ratings, the game that has made over 100 YouTubers rich, the game that I'm about to review.

Gameplay

The controls are easy enough, placed conveniently on the keyboard (or buttons/screen for that matter) and are (for the most part) easy to remember. The PC version does feature an options to change the controls, making it much easier for laptop users to navigate, and the game was made easily modded so users could create new gameplay and crafting elements. The gameplay and building is easy to get used to, and art is very easily made. There are even programs to upload art into the game.

Crafting

The game features a commonly used element in video games, and that is, you guessed it, crafting.

I feel as though Mojang was trying to troll us. Every good thing in the game requires mining, and you need like 20 diamonds if you want to get very far. You have to spend hours and hours literally punching trees if you want to have a good house with good storage, and even then, they barely teach you how to craft anything! Thanks developers, you really screwed us over now!

Creative Mode

This is one of the few things in Minecraft I enjoy. It has infinite resources, superflat mode (a mode in which everything is gone except the ground), the inventory menu is replaced with a menu split into several categories including food, armor, building, etc, and the actual inventory menu. You can stay in this world forever and never starve, die, or be attacked for that matter.

Servers

Minecraft, like tons of other games, has the feature in which you can create servers. Except you have to be the biggest geek in the world to even generally understand how. There are server hosting companies and shit, but they generally cost like $50 bucks a month, or even more! I know for sure when I bought this game, I thought I was getting the full package, not having to pay extra because I don't know how to fuck with ports and shit!

Realms

Do I really need to? Oh, fine. Realms is basically Mojang and Microsoft saying, "Give us money so you can play privately with your friends. Oh, it's also a monthly fee! :)" Need I say more?

Story

This game has literally no story. It's mindless clicking and typing. Now, before you say "But there's an end!" there's not, there's an "end" in which you like get an achievement, and then you continue playing. Plus, having an end doesn't mean there's a story.

Summary

Minecraft is horrible IMO. It's basically you paying so you can go online, learn bullshit coding techniques, money money money pay more money and more money, spend billions of hours making mods just so you can have a good time, and chatting with pedophiles on every kid-friendly server. If you wanna get this game, here's my advice: don't.



Reviewed by SnkEydKrisice

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